Where am I?

Life is beautiful it has so many hues,
Out of all of them why do I see only blue?

If someone asks “Hey how are you?”
I smile and say “Fine, thank you how about you?”

I smile but it doesn’t reach my eyes like it used do,
I laugh at jokes cos isn't that what you’re supposed to do?

Why is the pillow wet so often?
To sleep peacefully have I forgotten?

I listen to my ipod don’t want the bus to stop,
Mr.Conductor can’t I just sit here all day?
I have lots of time to while away.

The doc asks “Tell me where does it pain?”
I say “No where doc.” Ah how well I feign.

How do I tell him it pains deep inside,
The reason? Hell there is none but if you insist so much I can make up a ton.

I know it’s been long since I spoke to you dear god,
But won’t you please help me?
I’m trying to find the old me.

I knock inside me and ask anyone home?
I get no answer; she’s gone out somewhere to aimlessly roam.

So many changes in me I just cannot bear to see,
Help me, help me find the old me.

The VEILing Woman

Every holy books advocates modesty and decency. But who gets to interpret these religious books which teach/tell you how to live your life? The higher caste Brahmin Pujaris who exploited and discriminated against the people belonging to “lower castes” thanks to the status they had in society? Or the mullahs and imams who were all prominently MALE? Does god say women aren’t “pure” enough to be allowed to certain temples or that they have to cover themselves in a burqua in order to be modest? If yes then either god is wrong or the interpreters are!

These biased interpreters have been spreading the “lord’s word” for centuries! And they have quite successful in making billions of people believe that their path is the righteous one that will lead them to salvation. Will the Holy Quran which tests a believer’s limits of self restraint in the month of Ramzan tell women to cover up from head to toe in order to not “provoke” men. Men who are strong enough not give in to their hunger and thirst from dawn to dusk cannot control their sexual desires on seeing a woman without an added layer of clothing? I disagree, give men some credit they are surely not animals who do not know what constraint is.

I am not here to say why men don’t have to wear a certain garb to look decent. Because we need to go forward not backward. Now Men wearing a burqua isn’t going to help is it Today on Barkha Dutt’s debate show about Shabana Azmi’s comments on the
Hijab, Mr. Owasi said “To wear or not to wear the hijab is a completely personal choice”. But I fail to see where wearing it is a “choice”. I know quite a few girls who do not wish to wear the hijab. But they do. Where is the choice Mr.Owasi when a young girl is gifted a burqua on her 13th birthday? Isn’t it a not so subtle order from her mother, who herself had detested the hijab when she was a young girl but is too afraid of her daughter not being accepted into their “society”. I have worn the burqua quite a few times to get a view of some of my friends worlds. I felt in a single word “restricted”.

I fail to see how a woman entering into a temple can make the god impure? The same women who till not very long ago were considered goddesses? Laxmi, Devi, Saraswathi are now worshipped only on occasions like diwali, Dussera! What happened to the teaching in the Bhagvad Gita which rightly said a man will never prosper unless he worship the goddess who lives in the house in other words the wives/daughters/sisters.

Let us ourselves be the interpreters of religion. Let us all be the messengers of equality and humanity!

Why?

College days are the most memorable days of life. The carefree, aimless days are indeed truly cherish able but this age is also the time to make many decisions. “What next?” is one such imposing question which keeps looming at the back of your head when you are confronted with choices in career/life. You realize that its all in your hands now, the same freedom to choose which you demanded earlier doesn’t seem so appealing anymore. You ask yourself what you enjoy doing (studying rather) the most. And introspection is not something which comes to teenagers easily. Some also have the additional burden of parental pressure to follow the stereotype education say engineering, medicine etc [no offence meant to people who are willingly doing it] After you finally figure out what you are really good at comes the choice of college. And most of us are very prone to get carried away by the frivolities [ask me about itJ] the choice between the hip n happening college or the one offering better education. I think the choices we make the outcome of us answering the question “Why?” If you want to know the whys of practical sciences you take up engineering. If you seek the answers of the human body you opt for medicine. If the ways of economics and trade interest you, you take up commerce. If you want the world to become aware of the happenings you take up journalism.

There are a lot more questions like “What if?” This question is relatively easier to answer because for this there are two straight answers one right the other wrong. Even if you do make a few wrong choices nothing is lost you learn and grow wiser. You grow wiser when you get to see your marks when you choose not to study just like you grow wiser when you hurt people you love and they continue to stand by you. You grow wiser when you conclude whether the choices you made were right or wrong. We grow wiser in order to choose againJ

College Castes!

College!This word brings a smile to a lot of adult faces.Many of us at first had surely expected college to be a place to have fun and study at times(well ok i admit i had 2 years back:) Then came sound advice from a lecturer in junior college, she had said:Students many of you probably are expecting college to be a place to enjoy and have a crazy time but trust me this is not a karan johar movie and it does not happen that way.I have two words for that advice SO TRUE.Well junior coll was sort of an extension of school but now i have entered 'actual' college.Din't have any hopes of college to a party place this time thankfully a month has passed and things have become routine.But I observed one thing over the past month colleges are divided into castes!I thought the stuff shown in chick flicks like mean girls etc was fictional,i know naive me.Lets have a laugh now while I take you through the groups.

1. The Nerds: The people who follow every sentence the teacher says,write it down dilligently,nod their heads(remember noddy the cartoon?;) to the teachers tune,oiled hair.But no one messes with these people because you mess with them and no notes for you before exams.Haha.

2.The Dumb Blondes:Designer clothes,shoes bags earrings to match(or maybe clothes to match i don't know) Nothing wrong with looking good but c'mon they can THINK before talkin sometimes right.For them life revolves around make-up,clothes and boy-toys.Consider repeating the same outfit twice in a week as suicide:D Avoid the above group like plague!

3.The Wannabe's: The people who try to imitate the above group and fail miserably don't get what admirable quality they find in the 2nd group people but they whatever it is they consider them gods and obey every command.

4.The Tom-boys: Think they are boys,act like them(all the irritating boys characteristics included.Don't mingle with the 2nd and 3rd group.

5.The Back Bencher's: Add some spice to the boring classes with their interesting and innovative ways( which vary depending on the strictness of the lecturer). Laid-back people,the ones teachers loathe(the feeling is mutual actually;) classes would be incomplete without them.

6.The All Rounders: The ones who study well without being nerdy.Who look good without being Dumb,Who are not teachers pets but not their enemies either.

7.Me: I have no idea where I figure, don't relate to any specific group.So people who share my view welcome to the club:D

lifes a SWING

CHANGE now thats something that all of us can relate to.Playing with my little kid cousin today in the garden I went to the swings first like i always did.Amidst the swinging and the kid laughing it struck me maybe this might be one of the last few times i can do this.This meaning swing in my house on the swing which has a history of its own.My cousins now all grown up and successful had played in the same 'jhula'[swing],out of the three swings only one survived the years and more importantly the weight:D Numerous birthday parties,celebrations, marriage parties had taken place in this garden.Where five year old me and my cousins ran the everyday running race(i always won just for the record;) This is where i learnt to ride the bicycle falling but learning.I live in a joint family so since i was a kid it was survival of the fittest:)Having no animal phobias(except bees god i hate them),being able to talk to the rudest of people and being comfortable with the boys(having grown up with them) is sum of the things i learnt in my wonderful house.Haha i sound like an old woman reminiscing but i am sure gonna miss my house,the people but the memories will be with me close to my heart.

I Believe I Can Fly..

It rained yesterday!The monsoon has finally arrived to dispel summer.Each one of you probably welcomes the first few monsoon showers which bring relief from two months of anythin but pleasant summer heat.Most of you probably also get repelled by it after the few first few relieving showers turn to incessant downpours which bring along with it long hours of power-cuts,slushy-white-clothes-unfriendly-roads and winds which spoil fashion propah people's hair dos.Well blogs are an individual's views about things so here is my view on the monsoon season.For me the rains bring joy,a feeling of hope emerges within and spreads through out like that new tree growing. The weather perfect,fields turning a delightful green,the wind caressing my face,the birds chirping away for me its pure magic!No don't roll your eyes i'm not one of those hopeless young romantics, i'm here writting this because over the years i have observed the rains always seem to reassure me. Help me believe that my dreams and ambitions are very much attainable maybe its the effect of the small miracles taking place around at this time. Or maybe its just the little school child inside me for whom the monsoons represent a new beginning a chance to start afresh!

P.S:- This is my first attempt at writting a blog,any comments or suggestions are most welcome.